Black&Black
Delivering Smiles
- With Foles, the Eagles have been surviving with a one read, college offense. Bill Belichick isn't going to have it. Plus, he cheats, so he knows the rest of your playbook anyway. And then he'll go home, and fuck his hot wife. Because that's how the system works.
- The Eagles aren't going to win, so I predict this will be the first Super Bowl in history that a fan or fans will be murdered at the game. To be an Eagles fan is to be miserable. It's a lifestyle decision. Misery and violence. No happy endings, ever.
- Mack Hollins will score Philadelphia's only touchdown. Patriots will win 30-13.
- Players, coaches, and the media will take a massive dump on the military during the National Anthem. Because injustice, or whatever. The Vet who suffers PTSD from watching his friends torn apart by shrapnel in Fallujah feels your pain, Malcolm Jenkins.
- Falcon fans will watch the Patriots playing in the Super Bowl, and remember that they blew a 25 point lead against this team a year ago.
- Tom Brady will get concussed, briefly giving homicidal Eagles fans hope. But after a trip to the Magic Blue Healing Tent, he'll come back and be fine. Won't miss a single play.
- Brady throws two touchdowns, Patriots defense scores another. Eagles defense will do a decent job of holding New England to field goals, and generally keeping the game respectable for about 2 3/4 quarters.
- The commercials will suck. Again. America has lost it's sense of humor
- Robert Kraft will once again remind the world that, indeed, we are all Patriots. Then he'll pull a pistol out of his coat, and shoot himself in the head. It will be a dark, unexpected ending to the Patriots dynasty, and the most uncomfortable Super Bowl parade ever.
- The Eagles aren't going to win, so I predict this will be the first Super Bowl in history that a fan or fans will be murdered at the game. To be an Eagles fan is to be miserable. It's a lifestyle decision. Misery and violence. No happy endings, ever.
- Mack Hollins will score Philadelphia's only touchdown. Patriots will win 30-13.
- Players, coaches, and the media will take a massive dump on the military during the National Anthem. Because injustice, or whatever. The Vet who suffers PTSD from watching his friends torn apart by shrapnel in Fallujah feels your pain, Malcolm Jenkins.
- Falcon fans will watch the Patriots playing in the Super Bowl, and remember that they blew a 25 point lead against this team a year ago.
- Tom Brady will get concussed, briefly giving homicidal Eagles fans hope. But after a trip to the Magic Blue Healing Tent, he'll come back and be fine. Won't miss a single play.
- Brady throws two touchdowns, Patriots defense scores another. Eagles defense will do a decent job of holding New England to field goals, and generally keeping the game respectable for about 2 3/4 quarters.
- The commercials will suck. Again. America has lost it's sense of humor
- Robert Kraft will once again remind the world that, indeed, we are all Patriots. Then he'll pull a pistol out of his coat, and shoot himself in the head. It will be a dark, unexpected ending to the Patriots dynasty, and the most uncomfortable Super Bowl parade ever.
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