Toronto Wins the Stanley Cup When...

[Turbo]

Two guys from Toronto die and wake up in hell.

The next day the devil stops in to check on them and sees them dressed in parkas, mittens and toques warming themselves around the fire. The devil asks them, "What are you doing? Isn't it hot enough for you?" The two guys reply, "Well, you know, we're from Canada, eh, the land of snow and ice and cold. We're just happy for a chance to warm up a little bit.


The devil decides that these two aren't miserable enough and turns up the heat. The next morning he stops in again and there they are, still dressed in parkas, toques and mittens. The devil asks them again, "It's awfully hot down here, can't you guys feel it?"

Again the two guys reply, "Well, like we told ya yesterday, we're from Canada, the land of snow and ice and cold. We're just happy for a chance to warm up a little bit, eh." This gets the devil a little steamed up and he decides to fix these two guys. He cranks the heat up as high as it will go. The people are wailing and screaming everywhere. He stops by the room with the two guys from Canada and finds them in light jackets and bucket hats, grilling sausage and drinking beer.

The devil is astonished, "Everyone down here is in abject misery, and you two seem to be enjoying yourselves." The two Canadians reply, "Well, ya know, we don't get too much warm weather up here in Toronto so we've just got to have a cook-out when the weather's THIS nice."

The devil is absolutely furious, he can hardly see straight. Finally he comes up with the answer. The two guys love the heat because they have been cold all their lives. The devil decides to turn all the heat off in hell. The next morning, the temperature is below zero, icicles are hanging everywhere; people are shivering so bad that they are unable to do anything but wail, moan and gnash their teeth.

The devil smiles and heads for the room with the two Canadians. He gets there and finds them back in their parkas, toques, and mittens. NOW they are jumping up and down, cheering, yelling happily and screaming like mad men!!!

The devil is dumbfounded, "I don't understand, when I turn up the heat you're happy. Now it's freezing cold and you're still happy. What is wrong with you two???"

The Torontonians look at the devil in surprise, "Well, don't you know? If hell freezes over, it must mean the Toronto Maple Leafs have won the Stanley Cup."

 

[barracuda]

Good story, but a little inaccurate. Toronto is one of the more moderate temp places because of Lake Ontario, eh. And you would be more accurate to replace Toronto with the Hurricanes and indicate that:

"The Carolinians look at the devil in surprise, "Well, don't you know? If hell freezes over, it must mean the Hurricanes will see another Stanley Cup."

 

[Turbo]

Temperate places? Perhaps when compared to the Artic Circle. Perhaps compared with the rest of Canada. But it certainly wouldn't be considered "temperate" by most normal people.

I've spent a winter in Toronto - in 2000. I know.

 

[barracuda]

Originally posted by Turbo
Temperate places? Perhaps when compared to the Artic Circle. Perhaps compared with the rest of Canada. But it certainly wouldn't be considered "temperate" by most normal people.

I've spent a winter in Toronto - in 2000. I know.

Typical Southern whossy. I'll bet you had strings on your mittens so you wouldn’t loose them while you were there.

I lived there (Downsview on base) for about three years, they don't get a lot of snow and the large water mass keeps the temperature higher than say Barrie (100 km north)

 

[Turbo]

Originally posted by barracuda
Typical Southern whossy. I'll bet you had strings on your mittens so you wouldn’t loose them while you were there.

I lived there (Downsview on base) for about three years, they don't get a lot of snow and the large water mass keeps the temperature higher than say Barrie (100 km north)

Once again, you outdo yourself in ignorance. I've always stated here - I grew up in Michigan. 15 miles from Lake Michigan. I completely understand what a lake can do to the temperatures.

The worst thing about being snuggled up to the lake like that is the wind - it cuts through everything no matter what you're wearing. Plus, it brings the wind chill factor down - which is the same as it being much colder!!

BTW, just laugh at the stupid joke and get it over with. You're diverting the attention from the fact that the Leafs haven't won the Cup in ages and prolly WON'T even compete for it soon!

 

[slans]

lol

 

[barracuda]

Originally posted by Turbo

Once again, you outdo yourself in ignorance. I've always stated here - I grew up in Michigan. 15 miles from Lake Michigan. I completely understand what a lake can do to the temperatures.

BTW, just laugh at the stupid joke and get it over with. You're diverting the attention from the fact that the Leafs haven't won the Cup in ages and prolly WON'T even compete for it soon!

Your Ignorance is shinning brightly. If you bothered to read my post

Originally posted by barracuda
Good story, but a little inaccurate...

And you would be more accurate to replace Toronto with the Hurricanes and indicate that:

"The Carolinians look at the devil in surprise, "Well, don't you know? If hell freezes over, it must mean the Hurricanes will see another Stanley Cup."

But "You're diverting the attention" from the Joke and my modification of the Joke by trying to dazzle me with your incorrect meteorological correction, when in fact the Southern shores of the Great Lakes get hit a lot worse than the Northern shores (Think about it, Northern wind versus Southern wind)