Bold Motherfucking NFL Predictions of 2025

- Philadelphia and Kansas City both miss the playoffs. Denver and Dallas win the AFC West and NFC East, respectively.



- The Panthers win the NFC South, but in a weird way - I'm proven wrong about Evero and the defense carries the team while Bryce and the offense tread water. I'll be extra bullish and give the team a playoff win, but then Tepper does some silly shit next off-season to restore the 5-12 status quo.



- The Steelers win a playoff game - with Will Howard starting at QB.




- Houston goes to it's first AFC Championship game, before getting crushed in a Buffalo blizzard. Yes, the Bills finally get over the line. I'll even give them the Lombardi Trophy, probably over Detroit, who've become the new Bills.




- Daniel Jones is this year's version of last years' Sam Darnold. Indy makes the playoffs.



- This year's Sam Darnold gets benched in Seattle, first for Drew Lock but eventually Jalen Milroe. Seattle's GM becomes the surprise firing of January.



- Zac Taylor gets canned as the Bengals continue their slow descent back into Bungledom.





- Raheem gets cuckolded for his OC Zac Robinson.



- Patriots make the playoffs. Vrabel wins COTY.

 

I don't think either of these are that bold, honestly. Seattle's line sucks and Darnold is not great under pressure. And the Patriots have had a great offseason, and Vrabel has been COTY before. But I don't see New England in the playoffs, and I don't think you really do either. Based on your predictions, you have Buffalo, Houston, and Denver winning their divisions. Maybe Pittsburgh, but they have Baltimore to contend with. You also have Indianapolis and Pittsburgh in the playoffs. So that means either Pittsburgh wins the division, or they have taken a wildcard spot.

I think that you have somehow completely forgotten that the Harbaughs exist. To me, there's no way Baltimore doesn't get in, particularly if Cincinnati sucks. And the Chargers bring back most of an 11-6 roster. They may have lost Joey Bosa and half of their defensive line, but they also added Omarion Hampton and Najee Harris, and you know that the staff will know how to use them. I think that the Chargers and Broncos both get into the playoffs (not sold on Denver winning the division, but for arguments sake...). And I think that Pittsburgh and Baltimore do as well. So that means that the third wild card spot will be either Indianapolis or New England. And you like the Colts.

New England will probably go 9-8 and miss the playoffs. And they'll be happy with that.

 

I love Jim Harbaugh, but I don't love the Chargers off-season. They didn't add the outside receiver they needed to take pressure off McConkey, and the defensive line actually looks like ass on paper.


Bear in mind, missing the playoffs in the AFC could equate to a 10 win season. I don't think they take a giant step back by any means. They're just sort of where they are. A scrappy pain in the ass, but not a Super Bowl contender yet.

 

I do wonder what happens in San Diego* medium term- Harbaugh is in a race against his uncanny ability to piss off management, Greg Roman seems to fall apart come playoff time and Herbert is too good to use like Goff but seemingly not good enough to let off the hook like a Burrow.

*LA, shit I forget they moved to be 2nd fiddle in the rams stadium