Greedy Williams

Gimme that shit.

 

1:24

 

I love the name and his athleticism, but the knock on him is that doesn't tackle. I watched a few LSU games last year and wasn't that impressed, but that could be just because he wasn't given the opportunity to impress.

I would rather have a good edge guy. If our line gets more pressure, our secondary is going to suddenly look a lot better.

 

The young man sounds well put together.

 

Pre-draft analysis. I’ve always struggled with it. So many variables involved that either can’t or don’t factor into what player fits best where, and when.

The combine is an absolute waste of time as well. One big circle jerk for creepy sportswriters and overworked assistant coaches.

So I have no real opinion on who we draft, because I have no idea who we should draft.

My favorite is the post-draft grades, one week after the goddamn draft. The fact that this exercise has become its own little cottage industry tells you how fucking stupid most fans are.

 

Here’s my analysis: I give Carolina an A+ for not ending up with Leonard Fournette.

 

He's a cornerback.

 

Christian McCaffery
Rd 1, 2018
Carolina Panthers

Pre-season grade: B

A dynamic back who possesses rare lateral agility, McCaffery has added considerable muscle to his 5’9” frame. Carolina appears set to entrust the 3rd year back from Stanford with upwards of 85% of the team’s carries, with no plans to scale back his receiving presence in Norv Turner’s offense.

We’re giving this pick an A-. (Why the minus? Because, arbitrary-as-fuck sports analysis calls for it. The minus, folks, justifies every hack’s existence.)

 

God, I love Tom Coughlin.

The only thing that would make that GIF any better is Parcells sitting up there, staring hatefully at that stupid person.